


googly eyes

by orphan_account



Series: SASO 2016 Bonus Fills [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: (Fake) Underage Drinking, Canon Compliant, M/M, SASO 2016 Prompt Fill, fear daichi's wrath, fear it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 18:03:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6998839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<i>Alright</i>!" Nishinoya declares loudly, slamming his fist down on the coffee table in lieu of an actual gavel. "The 44th Karasuno Boys Volleyball Club Emergency Meeting has officially been called to order. First item on the agenda?" He cocks his head to the side and shoots Daichi a half-hearted glare. "The Daichi-Suga Problem."</p><p>Everyone groans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	googly eyes

**Author's Note:**

> saso 2016 bonus round one prompt fill for @bandera
> 
> the prompt was: remember when Daichi "accidentally" "drunk" texted Suga courtesy of his dumb friends?
> 
> and i went with this

It's two am and Daichi is tied to a chair.  
  
" _Alright_!" Nishinoya declares loudly, slamming his fist down on the coffee table in lieu of an actual gavel. "The 44th Karasuno Boys Volleyball Club Emergency Meeting has officially been called to order. First item on the agenda?" He cocks his head to the side and shoots Daichi a half-hearted glare. "The Daichi-Suga Problem."  
  
Everyone groans.  
  
It's two am and Daichi is tied to chair in the club room while most of his so-called _friends_ sit huddled in a circle around him, shooting accusing (and somewhat disgusted) glares his way.  
  
So, yeah. He's not in the best of moods.  
  
"There _is_ no problem," he grumbles, straining his wrists against the restraints tying him to the chair. "But there's _going_ to be, if one of you doesn't let me out ri—"  
  
"The prisoner isn't allowed to speak unless spoken to," Nishinoya sniffs primly, wagging a finger at Daichi. "One more word out of you and Ryuu has permission to use the tape."  
  
"Use the wha—"  
  
Tanaka grins as he, not-so-subtly, places a roll of duct tape on the coffee table. Daichi presses his lips together and nods for Nishinoya to continue, deciding that if his teammates are apparently mad enough to lure him out of his bedroom at _two am in the morning_ with fake text messages about a fire at the gym, then they're _definitely_ mad enough to duct tape his mouth shut.  
  
"Thank you," Nishinoya smiles sweetly, and Daichi quickly moves him right to the top of his 'People I Will _Destroy_ One Day' list, bumping Tanaka down one spot. "Now, back to the problem at hand."  
  
Everyone around the table groans and Daichi makes a mental note to bump them _all_ one space up on his list.  
  
"I know, I know," Nishinoya sighs, shaking his head a little. "But something _needs_ to be done. I think they've scarred Hinata."  
  
Hinata dramatically shudders, and Daichi watches as Kageyama, _Kageyama of all people_ , reaches forwards to give his hand a sympathetic squeeze.  
  
"I'm dreaming," Daichi murmurs. "This is all a terrible dream and I'm going to wake up any minute now in my bed."  
  
" _Ryuu_!"  
  
Daichi tenses as Tanaka plucks the duct tape off the coffee table and slides closer to him.  
  
"That's your final warning Daichi," Nishinoya says sternly, wagging his finger at him again. "One more word and you can say goodbye to that line of fur you're growing on your upper lip."  
  
Daichi shoots him his most powerful Death Stare but, wisely, stays silent. He'll get his revenge tomorrow during practice.  
  
"Right," Nishinoya says brightly, turning back to Hinata. "Now, for the court, wil you please repeat what you saw yesterday after practice?"  
  
Hinata nods shakily, voice quavering just a little as he glances over at Daichi. "I was putting the balls away and— And—"  
  
"Take your time," Nishinoya says softly. The rest of the group nod sympathetically, eyes shining just a little bit.  
  
"They were in the storage cupboard, getting the brooms," Hinata says slowly. "And they were talking to each other and, at first, I thought it was just a normal, friendly conversation, you know? So I moved a little closer and—" Another deep breath. "And I saw _it_."  
  
Daichi frowns, trying to wrack his mind to figure out just what the hell he'd said or done to Suga to make Hinata act like this.  
  
Nishinoya shakes his head and gently pats Hinata's hands. "I know this is hard, but please, you need to continue."  
  
"They were _staring_ at each other," Hinata croaks, fists balled up tightly on the table. "You know, the way they _always_ do?"  
  
Tanaka and Nishinoya both pretend to puke.  
  
Kageyama and Tsukishima shoot Daichi a disgusted look.  
  
Hinata whimpers and drops his head on the table.  
  
Asahi shakes his head at Daichi in disappointment.  
  
Yamaguchi averts his gaze.  
  
"I'm so sorry you had to go through that," Nishinoya says softly, patting Hinata's hair gently. "But, sadly, you're not the only one. All of us here have been subject to Daichi and Suga's pukeworthy ' _Googly Eyes_ ', and we all know just how terrible it can be."  
  
Everyone around the table murmurs in agreement.  
  
"Do you have anything to say for yourself," Nishinoya asks, turning to face Daichi, a look of contempt plastered across his face. "An apology, perhaps?"  
  
"An apolo— _No_?" Daichi frowns. "What the hell is going on here?"  
  
"Don't play dumb with us, Captain!" Tanaka laughs, fingers inching towards the tape again. "You know what you're doing. You _both_ do."  
  
"It's pathetic," Tsukishima sniffs.  
  
"Sickening," Kageyama adds.  
  
"Embarrassing," Yamaguchi mumbles.  
  
" _So_ embarrassing," Asahi sighs, looking as if Daichi has physically pained him in some way. "I can barely look at you two half the time these days."  
  
" _Why_?"  
  
"We're all sick of your pining!" Nishinoya snaps. "Every day it's something new. Lingering touches—"  
  
"Running your hands through his hair, pretending you're ' _picking out fluff_ '" Asahi grumbles.  
  
"Sharing each others lunch," Hinata pipes up.  
  
" _Feeding_ each other," Tsukishima adds, and the group collectively shudders.  
  
"Well— That was _one_ time," Daichi says weakly - though it's not much use, they're already ploughing on.  
  
"Wiping the sweat off each others foreheads," Kageyama groans, shaking his head as if he's trying to physically rid himself of the memory.  
  
"Sharing the same bottles," Yamaguchi sighs.  
  
"All of that and _more_ ," Nishinoya says, glaring at Daichi. "We're putting an end to it. _Now_. Ryuu, the phone."  
  
Daichi watches, eyes wide as Tanaka dives into Daichi's jacket pocket and tugs out his phone, sliding it across the table towards Nishinoya.  
  
"What the hell? I have a passcode you kn—"  
  
"One Three Zero Six," everyone drawls in unison, shooting Daichi another round of withering glares.  
  
Daichi sinks further into his seat. "What are you going to do?"  
  
"Something we should've done a long time ago," Tanaka says dramatically. "We're texting him for you."  
  
Daichi lets out a sigh of relief. "We text _all the time_."  
  
"Ugh." Nishinoya wrinkles his nose, gaze focused on the phone in his hands as he scrolls through it. "I can see that. Look," he flips the phone around and shows it to the group. "Good morning texts, good night texts, 'have you eaten yet?' texts. _Gross_."  
  
"We're _friends_?"  
  
" _No_ ," Nishinoya scoffs. "Me and _Ryuu_ are friends. This?" He gestures to the phone. "This is clearly something else."  
  
"I mean—"  
  
"So we're going to do what you've never been brave enough to do," he continues, a sly smirk tugging at his lips. "And put an end to all our collective misery."  
  
Daichi holds his breath as Nishinoya's thumbs fly over the screen with a surprising amount of speed.  
  
"Done," Nishinoya sighs happily, dropping the phone onto the table.  
  
"What did you do?"  
  
His phone vibrates on the table, distracting everyone from Daichi's question in favour of watching Nishinoya unlock it and begin furiously typing away again.  
  
"Oooh, add another emoji," Hinata whispers, crouching behind Nishinoya's shoulder. "Add another _four_."  
  
"Good man," Tanaka sniffs proudly, clasping a hand over Hinata's shoulder and squeezing tightly. "I've taught you well."  
  
"Don't forget the 'xo's'," Asahi adds, lips twitching upwards into a smirk despite himself. "As many as you can fit."  
  
"You're a genius," Nishinoya laughs, thumbs still flying lightning fast across the screen. "Aaaaand, _done_." He sets the phone on the table and grins brightly over at Daichi. "The Daichi-Suga Problem is officially solved. Ryuu, if you'd do the honours of untying our _dear_ Captain. Just, ah, just make sure there's nothing _sharp_ around for him to grab."  
  
Daichi resists the urge to tackle Tanaka (and then everyone else) to the ground once he unties the ropes and scarves around his wrists, waist, and ankles, deciding he'll get his revenge in practice over the course of the next few weeks. His eyes glint slightly and he imagines watching his (traitorous) team run lap after lap after lap after lap after la—  
  
"Plot your revenge _after_ you've thanked us," Asahi laughs, shaking his head knowingly as he hands Daichi his phone back.  
  
"You guys lured me out of my house at _two am_ , tied me to a chair, and then did something _weird_ with Suga on my phone," Daichi snaps, glaring at all of them. "Why the hell would I thank any of you?"  
  
"Because," Nishinoya whistles innocently. "Because I'm pretty sure your new boyfriend wouldn't like it if you got rid of all the team."  
  
"My new _what_?"  
  
Nishinoya winks and throws open the club room door, gesturing for the team to follow. "Like we said before, we did something _you've_ never been brave enough to do."  
  
Daichi frowns and stares at his phone, tapping it awake to see 'Suga: 1' flashing on the screen.  
  
Despite himself, his lips twitch upwards into a pleased little smile.  
  
Maybe he _won't_ make the team run laps until they pass out after all.  
  
Maybe.  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
**Daichi**  
SUGAAAAAA MY BEST BUD WASSSSSDUP  
⁽(◍˃̵͈̑ᴗ˂̵͈̑)⁽  
  
**Suga**  
Daichi?  
Is everything alright?  
It's nearly 3am  
  
**Daichi**  
EVERYTHNG IS FIIINE  
NOW  
THAT  
I'M SPEAKING TO YOU!!!!!  
⤴︎ ε=ε=(ง ˃̶͈̀ᗨ˂̶͈́)۶ ⤴︎⁽(◍˃̵͈̑ᴗ˂̵͈̑)⁽ ⤴︎ ε=ε=(ง ˃̶͈̀ᗨ˂̶͈́)۶ ⤴︎⁽(◍˃̵͈̑ᴗ˂̵͈̑)⁽  
  
**Suga**  
Are you drunk?  
  
**Daichi**  
heheheheehehehehehehehehehehe  
suga  
ur so smart  
thats why i love u xoxoxo  
;) ;)  
  
**Suga**  
Is this Nishinoya?  
  
**Daichi**  
....  
suga silly  
cant u read  
it's MEEE  
DAICHIIII  
  
**Suga**  
Noya, why do you have Daichi's phone?  
  
**Daichi**  
srsly what the heck suga??? how'd you know??  
  
**Suga**  
You accidentally added me into the group WhatsApp chat 'Operation Solve The Daichi-Suga Problem'  
  
**Daichi**  
oh.  
well.  
shit.  
  
**Suga**  
Mmm.  
What's the problem by the way?  
Is Daichi alright?"  
  
**Daichi**  
YOU  
YOU ARE THE PROBLEM SUGA  
WE WERE TRYING TO SET YOU UP  
BUT WE NEEDED TO PUNISH DAICHI  
SO  
RYUU SAID  
WE SHOULD PRETEND HE'S DRUNK TEXTING YOU TO SET UP A DATE  
THEN  
HE'D BE EMBARRASSED  
BUT YOU TWO WOULD STILL DATE  
AND WE'D BE FREE FROM THE ETERNAL GOOGLY-EYES  
  
**Suga**  
Right.  
Well.  
I'm not sure what 'The Eternal Googly-Eyes' is.  
But, cool.  
  
**Daichi**  
cool?  
  
**Suga**  
The date.  
Tell Daichi I'm free tomorrow night.  
  
**Daichi**  
wtf  
that easily????  
i thought there'd be more resistance ngl  
maybe we'd have to tie you to the chair too  
  
**Suga**  
Tie me to the chair?  
What?  
Where is Daichi?  
Noya. Please. Please don't tell me he's tied to a chair.  
  
**Daichi**  
GOODNIGHT SUGA  
GET SOME BEUATY SLEEP  
SO YOU CAN BE READY FOR YOUR DATE TOMORROW  
NIGHT!!!!!  
  
**Suga**  
Noya?  
Noya?  
God damn it.

**Author's Note:**

> *pretends this wasnt the most ridiculous thing i've ever written*


End file.
